Bryce's 10th Birthday

I am exhausted. Physically and mentally.  I do not know what I was thinking when I agreed to let Bryce have a sleepover for her birthday party.  It might have been the fact that Bryce had started asking me in January.  I did bring the number down from the 10 she originally wanted to 5.  I also made sure that the 5 were girls I knew would get along as well as any group of 6 girls can. 

Maybe if it wasn't for the fact that in addition to Bryce's birthday party, we had one to go to before hers and two parties--one for Jace & one for Bryce--today.  Or maybe its the fact that there were still girls up at 4 in the morning and back up at 8.  Whatever the reason I'm done--stick a fork in me done.

I am pretty happy how the party went over all.  The only plus side to Danny being deployed for the party is that it got to be really a girl fest--something he would not have enjoyed.  He might have suffered through it, but not enjoyed ;).  I'm extremely thankful that Jace had a friends to go to since it was such a girlie night. 

We started the evening out with some hair chalking I found on pinterest--basically dying the girls' hair (and skin on some of them :\  I don't know if it was the type of chalk that we used but some of them didn't show up as bright as it was on pinterest.  Oh well, the girls had fun.  The moms did too.

At the same time as we were dying hair, a Just Dance contest was going on in the living room.  That game was one of the best video game investments I've ever made.  The girls and two boys that were over here loved it.  It was so cute to see all of them dancing in the living room.

We did pizza, cake, ice cream and  presents in between dying and making lip gloss.

After we ate it was time to make lip gloss.  Another fun project that I think went well.  I'd change some things when doing it next time but it was fun.  I really enjoyed spending time with the group of girls that Bryce had over. 

Finally, it was time for them to calm down, do their nails, and go to sleep.  Needless to say I went to bed a little after midnight.  I had to get onto the girls to quiet down around 2ish and then woke up to a girl wondering around about 4ish.  After that you'd think they'd sleep in, but of course not ;) They were up and at 'em by 8:30.

The last girl was picked up by noon and then we raced to get ready and headed out the door by 1 for birthday parties--Jace's at Chuck-e-cheese and Bryce's at the Ice skating rink.  We got home at 5:30.  I knew Bryce was exhausted but was hoping that she could hold it all together but she finally had her melt down over who got to take a shower first.  And after that there was no consoling her on anything.

She managed to pull herself together eventually and we did one song as a family of Just Dance.  The winner of both songs we did--Jace.  I guess our little man can move it ;)  He was so sweet he told me that I was a good dancer before he went to bed ;)

I did learn some things this weekend.  One--having Danny here to help get ready for a party is a must.  I kept finding myself thinking over and over again how many little tasks he does that I don't have to worry about when we plan a party.  Two--thank goodness for Battle Buddies (BB).  My main BB had to go out of town this weekend, but thank you Ashley for being another great BB!  I do not know what I would have done without you!  Not only did Ashley take pics for the party (since I always forget to do it) but she ended up staying the night with me.  It definitely helped when making the lip gloss and during the girl drama moments.  Sabrina, Erin, and Penny, you also were a huge help and I appreciate you coming and letting yourselves get suckered into helping.  You girls rock and I am so thankful I had you there to help me keep my sanity! Three--I am never having a sleepover with more than 2 other girls again.  Four--If Jace ever wants to have a sleepover I'm throwing them in the yard with a tent and flashlights and his Daddy can keep track of them :D.

It's all about perspective...

On my way home from getting my fruit and veggies from Bountiful Baskets (check them out at bountifulbaskets.org) I looked at the mileage on my car to see how far past the oil change I am (yes, I am overdue dear) and it said a little over 20,000.  At first I was wow, I've put a lot of miles on my car already, but then it struck me how, when I was buying cars in my teens and 20s, if a car had 20,000 miles, it was NEW.  Mind you, I love my car and still think that for all the running around I do as the kids' taxi driver, 20,000 isn't bad.  But it struck me how it's all about perspective.

So, because I have nothing better to do while driving, I starting thinking about how most things (if not all) in life are about perspective.  My perspective about being military or military wife has changed a bit over the years.  When we were a young dual military couple, we couldn't wait to get out.  We were sick of all the rules. We were convinced we didn't make enough money, that our health care sucked, hated being away from our families (especially after Bryce was born), deployments were just torture, etc.  You get the picture.   I remember getting so mad at some of Danny's commanders about the silly stuff he'd have to do, and why they always picked him to go TDY.  Some moments I really had a "poor me" attitude.  Now, my attitude isn't always 100% perfect, but I LOVE being an Army wife.  I love the life we have made together and how this Army life has shaped our family. 

I've thought a bit about that kind of attitude because you see it in a lot of young spouses.  I think a lot (not all) of it has to do with whether you have decided that the Army is your career or if its just something you have to go through before you can start your "real" life.

Our perspective shift probably happened when I was pregnant with Jace.  There were some minor concerns over a heart issue with him and so they sent us to a specialist.  At this point I was getting out (ETS date was right after I got back from convalescent leave), and Danny was going to be getting out shortly after.  I even went and got a TX driver's license because we were convinced we would be back in TX within a year.  Well, after Jace's appointment with the specialist we were giving a copy of the statement of charges.  For those of you non military friends...we don't have to pay when we get referred off post, but they give us a copy of what they are charging the Army.  Well, lets just say the amount it cost for Jace's one appointment made us rethink Danny getting out.  We realized the health care may not be perfect but it does take care of us better than any coverage we could have gotten on the civilian side.  So instead of the Army being just a road bump in our life, it became Danny's career and our way of life. 

One book that I have wanted to start blogging about is called 1001 Things to Love about Military Life by Tara Crooks, Starlett Henderson, Kathie Hightower, Holly Scherer.  Today, since I'm talking about perspectives anyway, I'm going to start.  

The first chapter is "Worth Joining For."  When reading this chapter I remembered why I, at 21, suddenly had a desire to join the Army, as well as why Danny and I decided to have him make a career of the Army. 

When I joined the Army at 21, I was going to college in Moorhead, MN.  I was from Pierre, South Dakota and I wanted a change from what my life was like.  I wanted to see the world and learn foreign languages.  Before 21, I NEVER in a million years thought I would join the Army.  I hated to run, was not an athletic person, and despite growing up in a family that hunted, never fired a gun. 

But, something put the bug in my ear, and to everyone's surprise I joined the Army on February 13, 1998 and left for Basic Training May 19th.  I have not regretted the decision once.  I have gotten to see parts of the World.  Not as much as I had dreamed of--definitely not the areas I had hoped for--but I have seen things a tourist will never see in Baghdad, Iraq.  

I did learn my foreign language, and some other skills (like changing a tire in the middle of a combat zone).  I got the opportunity to fire a .50 cal, M16, & be an armorer (work on all sorts of weapons).  But, most importantly, I gained self-confidence.  I did not have this in high school, or college.  I think that is the most important thing, along with learning to say "NO" (Thank you Ann Griffin and Lori Roberts for helping me learn that lesson LOL), that I acquired.  I've learned that I can make it through and accomplish things I never thought in a million years I'd do.

On the Army wife side of that, I've also gained confidence by knowing that as much as I love having my husband here, I don't/can't depend on him to do everything for me.  I have had to learn to do things that, again, I never thought I'd do (taking apart a toilet for example).  Growing up there was always a "man of the house" and they did that stuff, so I completely grew up expecting that.  Boy was I in for a surprise.

I also think the health care is fantastic (see my perspective change).  I've had the opportunity to see civilian friends and family struggle with health care issues and insurance.  Ours isn't perfect, but the key I have learned is that as long as you stick up for your rights as a patient, you'll do fine (this is important no matter what health care you have).   Plus, no cost.  I didn't pay a penny to have either of my two babies.

I think the Army is worth joining for because in this economy, I do not have to worry about my husband loosing his job suddenly.  It has also given him a profession he loves and can continue to do after he retires from the Army.  His job is one that he is proud to do and I am proud of him for doing.  He is so handsome in his uniform--I can't imagine a day when he isn't called to wear it.

Finally, I may not have gotten to go to Europe yet, but we're not retired yet either.  There is always hope to see more of the world with the next duty station. :) 

My Little Man Jace

Okay, this is just a quick stop to mention a conversation Jace had with me at dinner.  I don't know why Jace has gotten on a health kick or were the idea came from, but he is serious about his healthy food.  It started a couple of days ago he kept asking if this was healthy, or if that was healthy.  Then yesterday he said that he's only going to have one thing bad for him a day (candy, cake, etc).  We had Taco Bell yesterday after practice and he told me he wanted a healthy dinner (didn't stop him from eating the tacos though LOL).  Finally, tonight he told me thank you for the healthy meal (I made pot roast, carrots, and potatoes).  He never eats the skin of the potato, but after I told him that's where all the vitamins where he ate it right up.  He kept saying he needed to be healthy and get big muscles.  And then he showed me his muscles.  I was cracking up!! He told Bryce if she didn't eat all her carrots she wouldn't grow any muscles.  He even asked if football was healthy for him?!  He said, "I've got to have a good diet." This kid is asking about cholesterol and everything.  Where is my baby?  All I have is a little Man of the House anymore--a role he reminds me about often. 



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Memories

Wow its been awhile since I blogged.  Last week was spring break and we stayed busy.  My father-in-law visited, made some freezer meals, and hung out with some friends, and celebrated Easter.  It was a pretty good week.  I didn't get any quilting or reading done, but I did have a great week.

The last couple weeks the only down side is that my daughter has hit her rebellious stage.  I have been at my wits end lately.  I find myself yelling more than I want.  I hurt for her because I know that me being hard on her makes her sad, but I refuse to let her become another child that feels entitled to everything they want, that thinks it's always someone else's fault, is selfish, or disrespectful.  It is my job as her mother to lead her down the right path---even if I have to shove her onto it.

Its also a little frustrating because I know she doesn't act like this for her dad.  In fact, whenever he talks to her its always "yes sir"  or "no sir"--it doesn't matter if he's here or across the globe they treat him like that.   I don't understand the power he has, but I do wish he'd share.  I also realize that in addition to the normal moodiness of this age, that she is struggling with Danny being gone and is testing my limits.  Doesn't make it easier, but in hind sight it helps to realize it.

Well, I finally decided I had to do something.  That something was get back to my praying.  I had slipped on making sure I had my quiet time with the Lord every morning.  I know that I am a calmer version of myself when I have had time with my Bible and prayer, but I had been lazy.  So I started this week off on the right foot and have spent every morning getting back to my Bible and praying.  It has helped me keep my cool--maybe not completely--but I'm not loosing it as bad as I was.

The other thing I'm doing is I'm getting back to tucking the kids in bed and singing to them.  My special song with my kids is "You are my Sunshine."  It started out as my song for Bryce but Jace loves it too so its both of their favorite song for me to sing to them.  At any rate, I tuck them in, we pray, and I sing to them.

With everything I had to do, and how tired I was all the time, I had gotten away from that.  I really think that extra time focusing on them is helping.  It helps Bryce go to sleep happy--even if I send her upstairs crying before that.

Well, tonight I started crying while singing it because it brought back a lot of memories of her as my little baby girl.  I sang that song to her all the time when she was an infant.  I started singing it as our good morning song when I was in the Army.  I would have to go in and get her ready for daycare at 5 in the morning and I'd sing her that song as we got ready.  Danny was deployed then too, so it was just us girls.  I ended up singing it to her more and more.  While we were rocking, or getting ready for bed, or in the tub, singing soothed her so I would sing that song to her a lot (I didn't have a lot of songs stockpiled in my memory LOL). I even remember singing that song into a video camera that one of the civilian contractors had--and he emailed it back to my mom so they could play it on the computer for Bryce.  Tonight, as I sang that song to Bryce,  I remembered cradling this perfect little angel--and I realized tonight that my angel still needs me to cuddle and treat her like that infant sometimes--and I'm okay with it ;)





 Here are some pics of when she was smaller--none of her infant pics are on my hard drive so I'll have to scan some for you tomorrow.

 This was Bryce at 1 1/2.  We were in South Dakota to pick her up after Danny and I had returned from our deployment. 

 This was during Danny's third deployment.  We went to a county fair near Atlanta with the in-laws and Bryce and I did the fun house :).  Bryce is around 3 in this picture.

 Bryce is 4 in this picture.  My Brother and his family had visited and we went to Tybee Island.  I love this pic of the three kids.

She is 4 in this pic also--My princess is all tuckered out here after a long night of trick or treating. 

She is and always will be my Sunshine.